Monday , 21 May 2018

Eliska Counce: Carpe November (Let the Eating Begin)!

eliska counceGoodbye, Halloween. We barely knew ye. But it’s time to move over for arguably the hippest month on the calendar for Texas: November, baby!

I’m just emerging from my carb-induced candy coma in order to kick off the new month. I sure do like the cut of November’s jib here in Texas. There’s no beating it. There’s no other place in which I’d rather be to spend this incredible month. Here’s the reasons November, particularly in Texas, can be so sublime:

It’s officially opens eating season!

Left over from Halloween and currently in my house is roughly a metric ton of candy. It’s enough candy to satisfy a small African nation, I am almost sure. Embarrassing riches of candy. I love being an American when one of my “problems” is too much candy. The first two weeks of November, every candy dish in every cubicle along the telecom corridor and beyond will runneth over with the fruits of Hershey’s labor, luring you in with its siren song. Mmmm. Sugar.

And then we get to Thanksgiving. Professional grade eating. Eating until you hurt and pass out eating. Stuffing food with more food before eating it. Cooking with pounds of butter. One word, people: casseroles. It is the season of mixing all our food in a bowl, not un-trough-like, and twice baking it. Pies…so many pies. Deep fry that turkey this year, dear? Yes ma’am! The warm hug for your belly that is mashed potatoes. And in Texas? It means tamales, homemade and delicious…Oh, November and Thanksgiving. You complete me.

November in Texas means time for patio weather! That’s right, rest of the nation, envy Texas now…because it’s finally cooled off enough for us to actually emerge into the sunlight without disappearing in a puff of ash and smoke. You see, the seasons in Texas are as follows: Summer. Just Had Summer. About to Have Summer. And Face of the Sun. And Just Had Summer puts us in a good and generous mood.

Go ahead and shovel your sidewalks and enjoy the frost on your pumpkins, you people with “autumn” in the North. We Texans are gonna enjoy the frost on our margarita glass as we sit outside the Mexican restaurant. In sleeves, no less! O sleeves. How I have missed you. But it’s dipped below 80, so we officially can pull out the boots and sweaters now. You might not get a chillier chance in Texas, after all. Yes, it’s al fresco season at last in the Lone Star state. Porch-sittin’ weather. Related: Yee haw!

November also gives the sweet gift of Daylight Savings Time, or Fall Back. Thank you, sweet November, for the extra hour of sleep. For keeping me from getting up what inevitably feels like the middle of the night. More importantly, for not having to raise children who sleep like corpses in the dark up out of bed for school. I love sleep. I am so, so good at it. Sleep is the new sex. Sleep and me go way back. Thank you, November.

Yes, football season is in full and glorious swing in November, the colleges are finding out who’s a contender this season, tailgating and all their associated heart-damaging snacks and beverages are plentiful. There’s new episodes of your favorite shows on television. The school year is just far enough along that the kids have discovered their routines but haven’t managed to lose, as they always do, their school enthusiasm just yet. And in Texas, the skies are blue, the air is dry. Ahhh.

So, go forth, my fellow Texans, and carpe November! Grab November’s greatness by the throat and throttle all the joy out of it you can. Enjoy your family as they gather to stuff themselves senseless. Root, root root for the home team. Eat pumpkin spice flavored something. Eat it outside. In a jacket, maybe. Wonder where all those Northerners manage to store all that extra clothing they have to wear this time of year.


Now, if you’ll forgive me, I believe it’s time for leftover Halloween chocolate. It’s eating season, after all.

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